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426 : Script VO

Ce script VO a été migré dans le guide de l'épisode.

FORMAN KITCHEN

Hyde walks into the kitchen. Eric is making a peanutbutter sandwhich


ERIC: Oh, Hyde, get this. Casey just came by to pick up Donna and he was out in the street just revving his Trans Am real loud and then he peels out in the street and he started doing doughnuts. And then, out comes Donna, all smiling and, like, looking at him.

HYDE: What a slut!

ERIC: Look. If she wants to date him, that's fine. But he doesn't have to be all loud and jerky about it. Jerky, loud, doughnut jerk.

KITTY (coming in): Oh, guess what, boys. I entered the big wiener contest at the Piggly Wiggly. And I won a year's supply of all-beef hot dogs! I'm a wiener winner! Well, anyway, we're having a barbecue.

RED: No, Kitty! I thought we were going to talk about that.

KITTY: Mm-hmm. Oh, and I saw Donna at the grocery store and she said she's bringing her friend Casey.

ERIC: What? No. I hate Casey. He's Donna's new boyfriend. Y…You have to uninvite him. Dad, tell her.

RED: Kitty, you've done a horrible thing. It could scar the boy for life. Now, let's do the right thing and cancel that barbecue.

KITTY: No. We're having it, and it'll be fun. And... we just…We won't give Casey any relish.

HYDE: All right! Once Casey finds out he's not getting any relish, he'll dump
Donna for sure. You are so screwed.


OPENING CREDITS

FORMAN BASEMENT


Eric, Hyde, Fez and Kelso are hanging in the basement


FEZ: So your mom invited Casey over for hot dogs? Well that's a plump, juicy all-beef burn.

KELSO: Ah, it's just typical women stuff. Like Jackie kissing that guy (Hyde hits him on the arm) Ow! Hyde!

HYDE: Yeah. Okay? I've decided if anyone brings up any more stupid girl stuff I'm gonna throw something at 'em. This time, I threw a fist.

KELSO: I'm sorry. It's just everything reminds me. Like, last night Rocky was on and I was thinking I'm like Rocky and Jackie is Apollo Creed. And she bashed in my face by kissing that guy! At least Rocky wins in the end.

HYDE: Kelso, Rocky loses.

KELSO: Oh, yeah? Well, why is he jumping around all happy?

FEZ: Because he goes the distance, fool.

ERIC: He loses the fight, but he wins in life.

KELSO: Who wants to watch a movie with a message like that? Ice-cream man! (he jumps up and leaves)

ERIC: You guys, I've been thinking about Donna. And I… (Hyde throws a magazine at him)

HYDE: This time I threw a magazine.

ERIC: No, guys, seriously. This barbecue might work out in my favor. You see, Donna's only seen Casey around his smelly, tattooed Molly Hatchet-lovin' friends. But when he comes to the barbecue, he'll be around us… good, clean, Lynyrd Skynyrd-lovin' Americans. And the comparison will not be kind to him.

HYDE: And then Donna'll come running home to you.

ERIC: No. Well, maybe. You think?

HYDE: So, instead of pounding Casey like you should, you came up with this zany scheme. Forman, you've officially turned into Daffy Duck (like Daffy Duck) You're ''dithpicable''!

FEZ: You know, I have lady problems too (Hyde throws a ball but Fez dodges it) Rhonda won't let me get past second base. I even said ''please.'' Magic word, my ass!


Hyde throws another ball and hits him. Fez throws it back


JACKIE’s BEDROOM


Kelso is painting Jackie’s toenails


KELSO: Y…You know what, Jac… I can't do this. Why should I paint these round, berry toes if some other guy is gonna end up lickin' 'em?

JACKIE: Michael, what are you talking about?

KELSO: I still can't get over you cheatin' on me. And I need to hear you apologize again. And this time, maybe you should cry or give me money!

JACKIE: No Michael. I am not gonna beg for forgiveness. I didn't make you do that when you cheated.

KELSO: Well, that is totally different. When guys cheat, it's because they need some hot action. But when girls cheat, it's way worse, 'cause girls don't even like sex.

JACKIE: We do too.

KELSO: Well, why aren't we doin' it now?

JACKIE: Because I don't want to do it right now.

KELSO: I do. Point made. Thank you!

JACKIE: No. You know what? We need help. We should consult the world's highest authority on relationships. Cosmo!

KELSO: ''Why you should touch your breasts every day.'' No, this could help. They seem smart.


FORMAN DRIVEWAY


The Forman barbecue is beginning


ERIC: Okay, Fez, when Casey gets here, ask him for advice about your second-base problem. My advice is gonna be way better than his, and, uh Donna will see that he's a greasy dolt.

HYDE: Hey, Forman, I have an idea. Set up a wacky system of ropes and pulleys and when Casey gets here, drop an anvil on his head.

FEZ: Because that's what Daffy does.

ERIC: Yeah, I got that.


Donna and Casey walk up


DONNA: Hey, guys.

ERIC: Hey.

CASEY: Hey, Foreplay. Getting a little shaggy up there, buddy (he rubs Eric’s head)

ERIC: Okay. Well, that's enough of that! Okay. So, uh… Hey, you guys are just in time. Fez was telling me about, uh, some kind of problem you're having with Rhonda.

FEZ: Yeah. Rhonda won't let me get past second base, and I really want to explore further.

ERIC: Mmm. Gosh. Well, I don't know I think if you're patient, and you're respectful when Rhonda's ready, she'll, uh- she'll wave you over.

FEZ: Well, thank you, Eric. That is very gentlemanly advice.

ERIC: Gentlemanly? Well, uh, guilty as charged, I guess. Hey Casey, uh, what do you think?

CASEY: Well, sometimes a seasoned lady like Rhonda she's gotten used to the usual order of things. So, I think the next time you're fooling around just, uh, skip second and go right to third.

ERIC: What?!

FEZ: It's genius! No wonder you never get any.

DONNA: Yeah, with Rhonda, you know, that just might work.

ERIC: W-Wait, you like that?

DONNA: Well, the words are wrong, but they sound so good coming out of his mouth.

CASEY: I got a way about me.


Donna and Casey walk away


HYDE: That worked out… (like Daffy Duck) ''thuper.''


FORMAN BACK YARD


Jackie walks up to Kelso


JACKIE: Okay, Michael. I found something out about our situation. This article says that cheating is a symptom of a deeper problem.

KELSO: Deeper problem? No! I don't want a deeper problem! I want a quick fix!

JACKIE: Well, too bad. Because I realized that I'm still hurt and angry from all the times you cheated on me. Okay? And that is why I kissed that guy.

KELSO: So what are you saying?

JACKIE: I'm sayin', I'm not sorry.


Kelso sees himself fighting Jackie, like Rocky. They’re in a boxing ring, wearing boxing outfits.


JACKIE (muffled): I'm not sorry! (she whacks him) Come on! Look, now I know why I cheated. You need to read this Cosmo and find out why you did. And I ripped out the boob pictures, so don't bother looking.


Donna and Casey are standing near a table. Eric walks up to them


ERIC: Hey, Donna, uh, would you like a hot dog?

DONNA: Um, maybe half.


Casey takes the plate and a knife from his back pocket. He cuts the hotdog in half


ERIC: Whoa man, you carry a knife?

CASEY: Yeah. You never know when a lady's gonna need a half a hot dog. It's funny man. You're the Boy Scout, but I'm the one who's prepared.

FEZ: He's like a gladiator.

ERIC: Okay, that's it. I'm bringing out the big guns. Oh, yeah. I'm introducing him to my folks. Oh hey, Mom, meet Casey. This is Donna's new boyfriend.

KITTY:…….Well, you're certainly not a girl! Hahahaha!

CASEY: Nice to meet you, Mrs. Forman. You know, you couldn't have picked a prettier day to win a year's supply of hot dogs.

KITTY (giggles): Yeah, sure is a hot dog (keeps giggling)

ERIC: Mom!

KITTY: Sorry, honey, it's just… He's just… I am sure you are much smarter.

RED: Kitty, the idiot neighbours drank all my beer.

ERIC: Uh-oh. You're in a bad mood. Hey, meet Casey.

CASEY: Pleasure, sir. Hey, maybe I can help. I always keep an spare case of beer in the Trans Am. Little tip I picked up in the army.

RED: I don't know. Seems like a pretty good kid.

KITTY: Uh-huh.


Later, Hyde and Donna are talking on the porch


HYDE: So, you and Casey, huh?

DONNA: Look, Hyde, whatever you heard about Casey, he's changed now. He's-
He's mature.

HYDE: Oh, yeah. He's real mature.

DONNA: Well, I like him! We're together, and if you can't deal with that, then you can just go to hell!

HYDE: Hey, that's not barbecue language, young lady!

CASEY: Here's that beer, sir. I got a soda for the minor (gives it to Eric) Now, you make sure to drink that real slow 'cause I don't want you to get a tummy ache, little guy.

KITTY: Well, that's thoughtful.

RED: Yeah, he cramps up easy.


FORMAN BASEMENT


Kelso and Eric are sitting on the couch


ERIC: Casey and Donna, man. Hey, remember when we were 12? We didn't even like girls yet.

KELSO: I liked girls when I was 12.

ERIC: Yeah, I was happy to stay at home Friday night in my underwear just tossin' a football to myself.

KELSO: Yeah, never did that either.

ERIC: Well, at least I gave it my best shot, right? If Donna loves Casey and not me, then, I mean, I guess it's over.

KELSO: Wha… Forman, you can't give up. Okay, look. Who knows what's gonna happen with me and Jackie. But what you and Donna had? That was, like, real. And I'm telling you, as his brother… Look, Casey is bad news. He's either gonna get bored and split, or something worse is gonna happen. So, you gotta do something.

ERIC: Hey, since when did you get all serious?

KELSO: Been reading Cosmo. It's very educational. Yeah. I never realized how much plumbing girls had down there. Like, there's this diagram, and it's like a map of Six Flags.


FORMAN KITCHEN


Hyde, Fez, Red and Kitty are about to have lunch


KITTY: Okay, everyone. Here's lunch. Hot dog soup!

HYDE: Arrr… No more hot dogs! I'll just eat the grilled cheese.

KITTY: You mean, grilled cheese with hot dogs!

RED: Kitty, for God's sakes I ate 14 hot dogs yesterday!

KITTY: Well, what do you want me to do, Red? They're everywhere. They're a curse on this house!

RED: Oh, fine. Let's make some calls. Maybe we can unload the damn things on a nursery school.


Red and Kitty leave. Eric walks up


ERIC: You guys, I have let this thing with Casey go way too far.

HYDE: Yeah, no kidding. Donna's pretty far gone. She's starting to lash out at people at barbecues. You gotta kick his ass, man!

FEZ: Hyde, Eric cannot beat Casey with his fists. He's a special boy who must beat him with his special strengths. Now, let's think. What is Eric's special strengths?


He sees himself as the quizmaster of the Get Into That Box game show


FEZ: Welcome back to TV's favorite game show… Get Into That Box! Now let's meet our returning champion, Eric Forman!

ERIC (sticking his head out of a box): Thanks. Good to be back, Fez.

FEZ: Let's meet our challenger, Casey Kelso! Casey Kelso, it's time to…

AUDIENCE: Get Into That Box!


Casey tries to climb in the box, but he’s too big and it breaks.


CASEY: How does he do it?

DONNA (running up): He's so tiny!

FEZ: I would watch that show.

ERIC: Okay. That was great. Guys, I'm going over to Casey's. And I don't know what I'm gonna do. But if things get physical, I'm just gonna have to drop the hammer.

HYDE: And if all else fails, kick him in the stones and run like hell.

ERIC: Yeah, that's what I meant by ''drop the hammer.''


FORMAN BASEMENT


We see Fez kissing Rhonda (from Rhonda’s perspective)


FEZ: Rhonda, your lively tongue has made me thirsty (he takes a zip from his soda) Would you like to wet your whistle?

Rhonda nods yes. Then she slurps up the whole can of soda, which annoys Fez a little

FEZ: Wow, thirsty lady. Well, we're off to a nice start. Shall we move on to second base?


We see his hand approach Rhonda. Fez looks content, then scared. We see how Rhonda tries to choke him


FEZ: Ay, no.


JACKIE’s BEDROOM


Jackie is doing her hair. Kelso comes in


KELSO: Guess what. I read your little ''everything's my fault'' article and I realized why I cheated. Remember the first time I kissed Pam Macy?

JACKIE: Behind the gym?

KELSO: And in the gym, and in her car. But, anyway… Earlier that day, I didn't have any money to buy you Tater Tots. You said that I'd never be able to support you, 'cause I wasn't smart enough. You're always puttin' me down like that, and it makes me feel bad about myself. And that is why I cheated.

JACKIE: That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard!

KELSO: Just like that. And then I thought about it, and I realized that I'm not sorry either!


We see how Jackie gets a punch in the face by Kelso, Rocky style.


JACKIE: Michael, what are you saying?

KELSO: I'm sayin' that we're not right for each other, because you make me feel bad! And… And… I don't think I can be with you anymore. I want to break up.

JACKIE: Wait, break up? No, no. Michael, I was wrong. Please, let's talk about this.

KELSO: No (he leaves)

JACKIE: Wait, but Michael!


KELSO FRONT YARD


Casey is reading a magazine. Eric walks up to him


ERIC: Casey, we need to talk.

CASEY: Well, I'm a little swamped right now, Foreplay.

ERIC: I think Donna thinks you love her and if you don't, you shouldn't act like you do.

CASEY: What are you? The love police? Hands up! Love police is here.

ERIC: Hey all I'm saying is that if you don't love her just don't be with her, okay? Because she's a really special person and someone out there could really love her.

CASEY: Someone out there or someone right here?

DONNA (Walks out): Oh hey, Eric. What are you doing here?

CASEY: He was just leaving.

DONNA: Oh. Well, I gotta go too.

CASEY: Hey, Pinciotti (he gives her a kiss on the cheek) Love ya.

DONNA: Oh, well, I… (she looks at Eric who is looking at his shoes) Thank you. Okay, well I'll, uh, I'll see you later.

CASEY: You see, Forman, it's just words. You don't have to mean it.

ERIC: If you make her cry, I'm coming right back here to kick your ass.


FORMAN BASEMENT – THE CIRCLE


KELSO: Well, me and Jackie are officially over. We're as done as this hot dog. (takes a bite) This hot dog isn't done!

ERIC: Well, if kicking Casey's butt is the same as babbling at him from a safe distance then, boy, did I do it! But seriously, you guys, the days of Daffy are over. It's time for action. I'm goin' Road Runner on his ass. Meep, meep! Pow!

FEZ: Good. Because thanks to his stupid advice, Rhonda dumped me. I tried to steal third, but she blocked me and choked me. Now there is no more baseball for Fez. It's back to handball.

HYDE: Girls, man. They'll make you miserable. Well, I got a date. (like Daffy Duck) ''Tho'' long, ''thuckerth!''


END CREDITS

FORMAN KITCHEN


Eric, Hyde, Kelso and Fez are looking at a Cosmo


ERIC: It's like Playboy but girls look at it.

KELSO: I know. How hot is that?

FEZ: Oh, look. Six Flags!

KITTY (coming in): Well, that better not be a dirty magazine. Oh, Cosmo. Good for you.

RED: Cosmo? You boys are spending too much time together.


THE END.

Ecrit par orelye 
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HypnoChat

Sonmi451 (14:26)

*finie

serieserie (14:42)

on se remet au boulot

serieserie (14:42)

j'ai bizarrement mal à la tête... peut etre levée trop tôt...

Sonmi451 (14:43)

surement oui

Sonmi451 (14:43)

tiens je vais chercher des infos dessus, voir si on peut avoir une corrélation

serieserie (14:43)

ah non mais c'était pas une question x) c'est sûr ^^

Sonmi451 (14:45)

oui mais tu sais à cause de quoi, tension, hormone? ^^

Sonmi451 (14:45)

tu as titillé ma curiosité

serieserie (14:45)

fatigue ^^' peut etre tension ^^

Sonmi451 (14:46)

pour moi c'est la tension

Sonmi451 (14:47)

mais pourquoi on a de la tension quand on se lève trop tot?

serieserie (14:47)

fatigue?!

Sonmi451 (14:47)

car en fait c'est la durée de l'éveil sans repos qui fait qu'on a de la tension mais pourquoi exactement ça je sais pas

serieserie (14:53)

beh ouais mais enfaite jsuis debout "que" depuis 11h c'est pas plus alarmant que ça x) c'est comme quand je me leve a 7h et qu'a 18h je dors pas x) et j'ai pas forcément mal au crane

Sonmi451 (14:53)

j'ai pas trouvé le champagne ^^

Sonmi451 (14:55)

ha ben tiens justement, se lever tard peut entrainer des céphalés

serieserie (14:56)

Ahah ^^

serieserie (14:56)

Bravo pour ta migration

Sonmi451 (14:56)

tiens en fait ça peut être dû à deux choses

Sonmi451 (14:56)

tu entraines un dérèglement de ton horloge biologique

Sonmi451 (14:57)

et as-tu pris ton café au même heure que d'habitude?

serieserie (14:58)

J'ai pas encore pris de café aujourd'hui et j'en ai pas prit depuis... jeudi

Sonmi451 (14:59)

ha ben j'ai découvert que le manque de café, enfin quand tu as une certaine dépendance, du moins si tu en prends régulièrement

Sonmi451 (15:00)

le fait de pas le prendre à l'heure habituelle peut entrainer des maux de tête

Sonmi451 (15:00)

je me coucherais moins bête ce soir

serieserie (15:01)

Ah! Beh j'en prends pas tous les jours donc

Sonmi451 (15:03)

bon alors je vote pour le dérèglement de l'horloge biologique! ^^

Sonmi451 (15:03)

Ca calme ta douleur, mon vote? ^^

serieserie (15:05)

Mdrr si seulement

serieserie (15:09)

Tiens dgrey a un de ces thèmes qui va bientôt être validé pour got

elyxir (19:04)

Je vous attend avec impatience sur the glades pour participer au focus ! Allez hop on s'inscrit pour participer !!

cinto (19:48)

Si vous connaissez Brian Kinney (Queer As folk), n'hésitez pas à la soutenir dans le sondage "Bad Boys" chez Dr House. Et son titre ne serait pas usurpé...mais quel charme!

serieserie (13:29)

Si des personnes veulent s'inscrire pour l'HypnoGame de Grey's Anatomy qui aura lieu CE SAMEDI c'est le dernier moment dès demain matin ça sera trop tard!!!

Profilage (18:39)

Nouveau sondage sur Esprits Criminels, un petit vote ? Merci !

cinto (22:54)

Demain, 20 Janvier, dernier jour pour poster vos cartes de voeux 2017 pour la quartier Ma sorcière Bien Aimée. Gros merci à celles qui ont participé.

Sonmi451 (13:48)

Merci de venir voter dans préférence.

CastleBeck (17:52)

Sondage tout neuf sur Orange Is The New Black ... En plus, vous n'avez pas besoin de connaitre la série pour voter!

lizzy69 (21:52)

Bonsoir à toutes et tous, n'hésitez à passer sur les quartiers ROME et The Tudors, afin de nous aider à redonner vie aux différents forums merci pour votre participation

CastleBeck (14:02)

Nouvelle photo du mois sur OITNB... et nouveau sondage depuis hier.

lachieuse (17:26)

Nouveau design sur le quartier New Girl, par serieserie, n'hésitez pas à venir le commenter

Locksley (19:59)

@serie² : merci pour l'organisation de la soirée HypnoGame ce soir ! Enjoy ! Bonne chance aux équipes !!

serieserie (21:43)

Grande partie d'HypnoGame en cours venez nous rejoindre!!!!

lizzy69 (08:36)

Bonjour à toutes et tous, n'hésitez à passer sur les quartiers ROME et The Tudors, afin de nous aider à redonner vie aux différents forums

cinto (15:45)

Voilà, les cartes de Voeux pour 2017 sont soumises au vote chez Ma sorcière Bien aimée. Inutile de connaître la série, juste voir, apprécier, choisir et voter. Merci pour vos votes et aux membres qui ont eu la gentillesse de créer ces cartes.

serieserie (18:03)

N'oubliez pas de voter dans les préférences, des thèmes et des bannières attendent vos votes!

CastleBeck (18:41)

Avant l'arrivée de Orange Is The New Black sur la télé française, le quartier vous propose un nouveau sondage et une nouvelle photo du mois... Même pas besoin de connaitre la série

CastleBeck (16:17)

Il y a de jolies bannières et de beaux thèmes qui attendent dans les préférences. Les quartiers concernés seront ravis de vos votes.

serieserie (17:58)

Nouveau design sur Lucifer! Venez donner votre avis! Alors plutôt ou plutôt ?

leptitange (18:04)

vous aimerez voir castiel en couplle avec qui ? moi avec roweena

lizzy69 (18:28)

Bonsoir à toutes et tous, n'hésitez à passer sur les quartiers ROME et The Tudors, afin de nous aider à redonner vie aux différents forums merci pour votre participation

elyxir (19:45)

Personne pour m'aider à redonner vie au quartier The Glades ? Je vous y attends avec impatience pour le focus de Janvier !

emeline53 (22:03)

Pas encore de créas pour l'animation de la St Valentin sur The Fosters ! J'espère que des volontaires apparaîtront

emeline53 (22:03)

N'oubliez pas le quizz aussi !

carina123 (10:52)

Personne à ce jour n'a commenté les calendriers des quartiers Lie to Me et Jéricho + vous avez les sondages, venez nombreux ! Merci !

serieserie (13:02)

Nouveau design et toujours l'animation: L'associé du diable sur Lucifer! On vous attend!

serieserie (13:02)

Et un petit clic dans les préférences serait cool

Sonmi451 (14:15)

Oui pensez à voter dans préférence des bannières et thèmes attendent, merci.

CastleBeck (14:17)

Vous faites de l'excellent travail de promo! J'allais écrire la même chose

Sonmi451 (14:24)

Ben oui j'ai vu ta bannière^^

CastleBeck (15:03)

J'ai hâte qu'elle se retrouve dans le quartier, cette bannière

Rejoins-nous !

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