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210 : Script VO

Ce script VO a été migré dans le guide de l'épisode.

RED AND KITTY’s BEDROOM

The alarm goes off at 8.23 am, playing Rhythm of the Rain

KITTY (leaning on Red): Whoooooo’s the birthdayboy?? (louder) Whoooooo’s the birthdayboy??

RED: The uhm good-looking guy to your left?

KITTY: That’s right! Happy happy happy happy birthday Red! AHahaha! Would the special birthday boy like a special birthday present? (she looks under her sheets) Oeh, it’s already unwrapped...

RED: And just my size too! (they kiss)

A huge crash, and the ceiling falls on their bed

KITTY: Oh my...

RED: Well...happy birthday to me. (he looks up into the hole)



OPENING CREDITS

PINCIOTTI KITCHEN

Donna sitting at the table, knock on door

DONNA: Yeah?

HYDE walks in: Hey man.

DONNA: Hey what’s up?

HYDE: Well it’s Red’s birthday and I gotta get him a present so where do your parents keep their booze?

DONNA (points to the kitchen): Pretty much everywhere!

HYDE: Cool! (opens cabinet and takes two bottles) Okay, Red Forman, you know him you love him. What do you think, Blueberry brandy of Peach Schnapps?

DONNA: Hmmm, definitely the Schnapps.

HYDE: My thoughts exactly. Hmm, this one’s for me! (puts the brandy in his pants)

MIDGE walks in and looks on the fridge: OH I see your father left me another message, God he’s an ass (she writes something on the paper that’s on the fridge)

DONNA: Hello mom! I have company!

MIDGE: Oh I didn’t see you there Steven. Isn’t Bob an ass? (she leaves)

DONNA: Okay uhm, my parents are freaks and I’m sorry you had to see that.

BOB walks in, straight to the fridge: OH YEAH?! (writes something on the paper) Donna I don’t want you reading this!

DONNA: Dad Hyde’s here!

BOB to Hyde: Well you can read it because you’ll appreciate it (to Donna) but not you! (he leaves)

DONNA: This sucks!

HYDE: Well you wanna talk about it?

DONNA: No... You know they wanna date other people?!

HYDE: Your mom’s dating?

DONNA: Hmhm.

HYDE: So where am I, do I have a shot?

DONNA: Oh could you please date my mom, it’ll make my life so much better Hyde.

HYDE: Hey, call me Dad!

DONNA: Yeah but you know what the worst part is?

HYDE: Watch your parents split up and know there’s not a damn thing you can do about it?

DONNA: Exactly! And you know what else, my mom moved out of their bedroom into the guestroom.

HYDE: Yeah that sucked when my Dad split. But I can honestly say that my parents divorce made me the man I am today.

DONNA: Oh man, am I gonna go crazy and think the government is out to get me too?

HYDE: The government IS out to get you!

FORMAN’s LIVING ROOM

Eric, Kitty and Hyde are sitting on the couch

KITTY: Okay, now, I want your father to enjoy this birthday, so we’re all gonna try our best to make it good.

Laurie walks in

KITTY: Except for Laurie who’s going to stumble in smelling like cigarettes and beer.

LAURIE: Hey at least I’m here.

KITTY: You better be here with a present, I gave you 20 dollars yesterday.

LAURIE: God, relax.

KITTY: Oh you can it Laurie!

ERIC: Yeah can it Laurie!

KITTY: Can it Eric.

LAURIE: Yeah can it Eric!

KITTY: I thought I told you to can it!

ERIC: Yeah Laurie can it.

HYDE: Why don’t you both can it?!

KITTY and ERIC to Hyde: CAN IT!

Red comes down the stairs

KITTY: Oh look, it’s the birthday boy!

They all jump up and clap their hands

KITTY: Come on in birtday boy, open your presents!

ERIC: I wonder what’s in the big one...

RED: Is it a... Corvette? (he unwraps it) Nooo, it’s a 2 by 4.

ERIC: For the roof!

RED: Oh yeah. Thanks for reminding me...

HYDE: Here you go Red, this will help you forget (hands him the booze) Happy birthday man!

LAURIE: Daddy, this is for you (hands him an envelope)

RED: Well, let’s see here! (opens card) Well seven dollars! Isn’t that something! Thanks sweetie (they hug)

KITTY: Ahahaha..(takes Laurie away) If I don’t have thirteen dollars on my dresser by tonight, then so help me God...

LAURIE: The card cost 50 cents!

KITTY: Fine, 12,50 and I want a receipt!

LAURIE: Whatever... (leaves)

KITTY: Okay boys, thank you for the wood and the booze.

Hyde and Eric leave

KITTY: Okay, now, one more present.

RED: Oehh (shakes gift) Underwear!

KITTY: Oh, dammit. Well, happy birthday.

RED: Sooo, is the happy birthday fun over yet?

KITTY: Noooo...ahahaha...Bob and Midge wanna take us out to dinner tonight.

RED: Bob and Midge?! Kitty it’s my birthday!

KITTY: I know but they like you and they want you to have fun on your birthday like I do.

RED: If they really like me they’d leave me alone!

FORMAN BASEMENT


ERIC: Man, last night we could hear the Pinciotti’s fighting al the way across the driveway. It was horrible. It was all: ‘You’re the devil Midge’ ‘OH Bob, shut up’

KELSO: ‘OH Bob, shut up’, that’s classic!

HYDE: Man if you get any dumber you’re gonna need a helmet. Bummer for Donna huh, can’t believe they’re sleeping in different bedrooms.

ERIC: Yeah I know. Wait I don’t know, what are you talking about?

FEZ: Well, Hyde knows something about Donna that Eric does not know. This is an interesting development, let’s watch...

HYDE: Midge is sleeping in the guestbedroom man.

ERIC: How did you know that? Did Donna tell you that?

HYDE: Look Forman, it’s not a big deal. I guess she’s just telling me stuff she’s not telling you.

JACKIE: See, this is why communication is so important. Now, Michael and I always...

ERIC: Excuse me, we were talking about Donna and me and how...

JACKIE: Oh hush, no-one cares! Now, Michael never keeps secrets from me, do you sweetie?

KELSO: Huh? Oh, no, never.

JACKIE: Michael, you hesitated! Why did you hesitate?

KELSO: No I didn’t hesitate! Did I Hyde?

HYDE: Yep.

KELSO: Fez?!

FEZ: Oh yes if you really loved her you would not have hesitated.

JACKIE: Conversation Michael! The van! NOW! (she drags him with her)

KELSO: Noooooo, noooo I didn’t hesitate! You guys are DEAD!

RESTAURANT

KITTY: Well, so what do you think birthday boy? Cause I think it’s gonna be fun!

RED: Well you know, good food, old friends, this might not be too bad Kitty.

Bob and Midge come in, they each brought a date

BOB: Hehey, the gangs all here! This is my date Carol.

MIDGE: And this is my date, Ted.

RED: You brought dates?!

BOB: We sure did!

KITTY: Ahahahahaha! Happy birthday!

RESTAURANT, later that evening

BOB: Yeah Carol here is just terrific, she loves horses!

CAROL: I love horses!

MIDGE: And Ted’s a marriage counselor!

KITTY: You have just done a lovely job with these two.

TED: Hey thanks! (to Bob) Hoehaa!

RED: Riiiight. So you two are gonna save your marriage by dating strangers. Great.

MIDGE: When you say it like that Red it sounds stupid.

RED: Okay Midge, say it so it doesn’t sound stupid.

KITTY: Okay here now maybe this cheese toast will make your birthday happy.

RED: No Kitty, I think I have lost my appetite (waiter puts a plate in front of him) God that is a great looking T-bone! Is there butter on this?

TED: Hoehaa!

RED: Riiight. Now I’m gonna eat this steak, but first, I’m gonna make a birthday wish. Here it is: I wish everyone would shut up! (he starts cutting his steak)

THE VISTACRUISER

Eric and Donna are making out

DONNA: Something wrong?

ERIC: No. So, is there anything on your mind? Someone you might wanna talk to?

DONNA: No (grabs Eric and kisses him)

ERIC in his mind: Don’t take no for an answer, she talked to Hyde, get her to talk to you. Get her to... Oh my God, that can’t be her tongue, can it? How is she doing that?! So...soft...so...WAIT! Focus! Talk!

ERIC: So, nothing on your mind? Nothing..(Donna takes off her jacket) That’s a pretty little...shirt... (they start to kiss again)

ERIC in his mind: Holy God, she’s sucking my tongue, she’s sucking my tongue, oh my God even her spit is sweet, it’s like licking jelly...there is something wrong with me...No there’s not, I’m seventeen...WAIT!

ERIC: So NOTHING? To confide? In me? Eric? Your boyfriend?

DONNA: Well okay, here is something... I love making out with you (she kisses him again)

ERIC in his mind: There! So we talked. Yeah, that was nice (they lay down)

RESTAURANT

CAROL: Horses are beautiful. And they’re very smart, they can count you know.

KITTY: Oh honey honey, you just...you just gotta shut up!

TED: Speaking of, has anyone read ??? I gave a copy to Midge, but no offence sweetie, it may be a little too deep for her.

MIDGE: Wait a minute! What do you mean, no offence?

TED: Well I mean, don’t be offended.

MIDGE: Oh! (laughs and continues eating)

BOB: Listen, you insult my wife one more time youre gonna be wearing your steak as a hat!

TED: I’m sorry!

MIDGE: Oh Bob that was so sweet! Like in highschool when you used to hit people just for looking at me. Remember?

BOB: Course I remember. I still have the scar from Joe Abruzzi’s dental plate! (he shows his hand to Midge)

MIDGE kisses his hand: You big bear!

BOB: Rooaarrr! (he starts kissing Midges hand, working his way up her arm) I errr..left my wallet in the car Midge! (he leaves)

MIDGE: OH, I left my...sex with Bob in the car! (she leaves)

RED: Check please! (waiter hands it to him, Red takes a look) Ah there you go, that’s for you! (hands the tab to Ted) Come Kitty (they leave)

THE BASEMENT

ERIC: Donna wouldn’t even talk to me, she just kept sticking her tongue down my throat.

HYDE: Oh boohoo Forman! You get to fool around with a totally hot chick and you never have to talk about her feelings. Ts, you poor french-kissing bastard.

KELSO: Yeah Hyde’s right. One time I asked Jackie what was wrong, and she didn’t shut up for like three straight days.

FEZ: You know Kelso, sometimes you do not know what you have until it is gone. And then someone else has it, and it is not you, and then that someone else is really happy.

KELSO: What are you talking about?

HYDE: You don’t know what he’s talking about? I say get the helmet! (Eric gets up and gives a football helmet to Hyde) Kelso put this on!

KELSO: Shut up, I’m not putting the helmet on! And what are you talking about?

FEZ: I’ll tell you what I’m talking about if you put the helmet on.

KELSO puts it on: FINE!

FEZ: If you don’t take care of Jackie, you are going to lose her.

KELSO: Pfffttt....that’s just stupid!

ERIC: Look Hyde, all I know is that you’re talking to my girlfriend and I don’t like it.

HYDE: Hey man, I was friends with Donna before you ever became her little boyfriend.

ERIC: Hyde, you’re pissing me off!

HYDE: Why don’t you think Forman, you get to make out with one of the hottest chicks in Wisconsin, while I’m being all sympathetic and relating my crappy life to her, and I’m pissing you off? You’re supposed to be the friend and I’M supposed to be the make-out guy! Now that I think about it, you’re pissing ME off!

THE GARAGE

Red and Kitty get out of their car

RED: What the hell kind of a world are we living in? Hey, let’s date other people, hey, let’s date other people but ditch them and do it in a car! That’s enlightend? In my days we called them degenerates and we stoned them! With big rocks!

KITTY: Oh, you did not.

RED: Well, we should have.

KITTY: Well you know, your birthday is not over for another two hours...

RED: Oh Kitty, we have no ceiling on our bedroom. What if a plane flew over?

KITTY: Okay...Well the kids are out, there’s a big comfy couch in the livingroom...

RED (hugs Kitty): You know what I love about you?

KITTY: What?

RED: Lots of stuff! Come on (opens kitchen door) I’ll race ya!

They burst into the livingroom, where Fez, Kelso and Hyde are watching TV

HYDE: Hey Red, Mrs. Forman. How was your night?

RED: What the hell are you doing in my livingroom?

KELSO: Watching Star Trek. In color. See that guy, he’s one side black and one side white and the othet guy is one side white, one side black. In color!

RED: This house is always littered with kids! It’s like we’re...mormons!

KITTY: Okay, come on, follow me sailor (she takes him by his arm)

FEZ: Red needs to control his anger.

RED: I HEARD THAT!

Red and Kitty are in the kitchen

KITTY: Oh I know! Let’s go to the basement!

RED: Oh Kitty. I just want this day to be over.

KITTY: No! This day is not over! I wanted you to have a nice birthday, you know, sometimes birthdays are not just about you, they are about the people around you who want you to have a nice birthday. SO, it’s about ME, now get downstairs and get those pants off mister!

PINCIOTTI KITCHEN

Eric enters

ERIC: Donna, I’m glad you’re here. I’ve been thinking about this a lot, and ehm I’m not mad anymore.

DONNA: Okay. Mad about what?

ERIC: Oh, well uhh, Hyde told me that you two talked about your home-situation...

DONNA: You guys talked about me?!

ERIC: Yeah...well...see but Kelso was wearing a helmet so he only heard like half of it...and I’m not really sure about Fez his grasp of English, I mean he nods a lot but...

DONNA: I can’t believe you guys talked about me!

ERIC: Well...to be honest, it was al lot of Hyde, with the uhhh (waves his hands) Donna and the parents and the separate bedrooms and we all like whooo ho, hold up there Hyde, I don’t think she’d like you talking about...

DONNA: GOD!!

ERIC: NO! I...Just hear me out! Cause...I don’t know why you talked to Hyde, but...I forgive you.

DONNA: YOU forgive ME?

ERIC: ....No,...what I’m saying..you don’t have to do that anymore, because I’m here for you!

DONNA: Okay, thanks loads Eric, but you can’t help me with this. Your family is...a family!

ERIC: Donna to be fair, you didn’t give me a chance, you never came to me with this.

DONNA: Allright fine! You know what, you wanna be part of this whole thing? You do? Fine! My parents, they’re on a freakin’ date right now!

ERIC: Well, you know, that’s nice.

DONNA: With other people!

ERIC: Well you know, the more the merrier, take some of the pressure off...

DONNA: They’re each dating the other people!!

ERIC: But they’re married... OH GOD!!!

DONNA: See!

ERIC: I mean, I don’t know...

Bob and Midge enter the kitchen

BOB: Hey Donna, Eric, glad you’re here, great news!

MIDGE: Your father and I had sex!

DONNA: Oh my...

BOB: In the car!

DONNA: Oh my....

ERIC: Well that’s...SUPER, right? Isn’t that super Donna, I don’t...

DONNA: Are you guys like back together ?

BOB: Oh no.

MIDGE: Yeah, why ruin a good thing?

They leave, chasing eachother

DONNA: Okay...so...what’s your take on that?

ERIC: .........I got nothing......

DONNA: What am I gonna do?

ERIC: I don’t know. So..hey...who’s your stupid boyfriend?

DONNA: Errr...you are...

ERIC: Hey at least I’m trying to get smarter right?

DONNA: Thank you (Eric takes Donna’s hand)

FORMAN LIVINGROOM

JACKIE: Say it.

KELSO: I do not keep secrets from you.

JACKIE: Again.

KELSO: I do not keep secrets from you.

JACKIE: Again.

KELSO: I do not keep secrets from you.

FEZ: Aiiii SHUT UP! I am going insane! Kelso, if you want to possess a woman, this is what you need to do (he takes Jackies hand) I as a mortal, am not worthy of your love, you are a goddess, and I worship you. And I dedicate every moment of my waking life to your joy...

KELSO taking Jackies hand: Okay, what he said!

JACKIE: Oh Michael!

They hug and kiss. Fez puts on the football helmet and starts hitting his head on the table.

FORMAN BASEMENT

Red and Kitty are laying down on the couch under a blanket

KITTY: I don’t know any Mormons that do that!

RED: Not without a permit anyway! You know Kitty, this ended up being a pretty good birthday after all.

KITTY: Oh yaaaaayyyy! Happy birthday!

RED: Thanks.

KITTY: What is this?

RED: Ahh cornchips! (they start eating)

THE END

Ecrit par mad_maria 
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HypnoChat

Sonmi451 (23:24)

Haaa ça je sais! lol

CastleBeck (23:25)

Sur ce, moi, il parait que je dois retourner travailler (et pelleter), alors je vous souhaite une excellente fin de soirée et une bonne nuit

stanary (23:26)

Bon courage au travail
Bonne nuit et bonne fin de soirée.

Sonmi451 (23:28)

Travailles-bien !

CastleBeck (23:29)

Merci

Sonmi451 (23:35)

Sur ce j'y vais aussi.

Sonmi451 (14:23)

Bonne journée à tous! Et Joyeuse St-Nicolas!

arween (18:40)

Vous êtes nombreux à fêter la Saint Nicolas ?

Xanaphia (19:04)

En tout cas chez moi aussi ça se fête Alors bonne Saint Nicolas

arween (19:05)

Dans le sud, ça ne se fête pas du tout

Xanaphia (19:11)

Et oui c'est plutôt du nord et de l'est de la France +la Belgique, si je ne dis pas de bêtise ^^

arween (19:11)

ouais donc loin de chez moi ^^

Xanaphia (19:12)

vous avez des fêtes spéciales par chez vous ?

arween (19:13)

Non rien du tout

arween (19:13)

Ah attends si on la fête de mai.

arween (19:14)

Mais je crois que c'est juste à Nice

Xanaphia (19:14)

la fête de mai ?

mnoandco (19:14)

Oui, chez moi aussi il y a la Saint Nicolas (Nord Est) ! et le père fouettard...pour les pas gentils...ne me sens évidement pas concernée!

arween (19:15)

Honnêtement je ne sors pas beaucoup là où il y a foule alors je sais pas trop ce qu'ils font

Xanaphia (19:15)

coucou ah oui le folklore local ^^

Lolo1710 (19:27)

Saint Nicolas c'est sacré en Belgique, les primaires font un spectacle chaque année puis les autre c'est surtout pour les bonbons ?

Xanaphia (19:29)

Ou les chocolats et les coquilles

Lolo1710 (19:41)

Ouaip, un truc génial aussi mais c'est peut être que dans mon école, c'est les filles qui font régime et qui troc des bonbons contre des mandarines

Sonmi451 (21:20)

Moi je fais saint-Nicolas car mon homme est du nord-Est mais ma fête à moi arrive jeudi. ^^

Sonmi451 (21:20)

Avec la fête des lumières.

Sonmi451 (21:21)

Bonsoir au fait!

Xanaphia (21:30)

Bonsoir Ah la fête des lumières ça doit être joli ^^

Sonmi451 (21:36)

Très.

Sonmi451 (21:37)

Cette année, je vais me contenter de mettre les lampions aux fenêtres.

serieserie (08:40)

Bonne journée de chasse aux cadeaux sur la citadelle!

arween (10:57)

Bonjour la citadelle ! Une grande animation vous attends sur The Night Shift, venez participer !

seriepoi (11:05)

Bonjour tout le monde ! Vous pouvez, si vous le souhaitez, venir sur le quartier "True Blood" pour commenter le (très) beau calendrier de décembre, fait par Sonmi. Merci par avance et bon dimanche à tous.

ObikeFixx (11:25)

Bonjour tout le monde! En plus du nouveau sondage, n'hésitez à venir découvrir le nouveau calendrier et la nouvelle photo du mois sur le quartier "The Last Ship"

Phoebus (14:15)

Bonjour tout le monde ! Il ne vous reste plus qu'une journée pour voter pour la voter de l'épisode 8x05 de The Vampire Diaries et pour participer à la review de cet épisode.

serieserie (16:44)

Inscrivez-vous vite pour la grande partie d'HypnoGame Arrow qui aura lieu dans 6 jours!! Rendez-vous dans les forums de l'accueil!!

arween (18:46)

Venez voir les nouveaux calendriers de The Night Shift (serie²) et Dollhouse (Xana).

emeline53 (19:24)

Seulement 2 persones pour commenter le design Noël de The Fosters ? Venez donner votre avis en plus, un sondage sur votre souhait de cadeau est en ligne !

stella (19:25)

Special spécial Noel sur le quartier Downton Abbey et sans oublier son calendrier de l'avent original

DGreyMan (22:40)

Bonsoir. Sondage dédié à "Game of Thrones" dans le quartier "Harry Potter"...

DGreyMan (22:40)

... ou le contraire ! ^^

serieserie (09:07)

Plus que quelques jours pour vous inscrire à la grande soirée HypnoGame Arrow dans les forums de l'accueil ou par MP!!!

arween (09:44)

Bonjour à tous ! Aujourd'hui nous lançons une toute nouvelle rubrique, les reviews. Rendez-vous sur la page HypnoReview ou à l'accueil pour plus d'infos Bonne lecture et bonne journée !

Titepau04 (09:49)

Bonjour !!!! Venez vous inscrire aux concours de Noël dans les quartiers de ncis Los Angeles et s club 7!!!
Et n'hésitez pas à commenter les calendriers au passage!!

cinto (11:39)

Fans de Dallas, Friends, Petite maison , Mission impossible, venez défendre votre série préférée chez Ma sorcière bien aimée: sondage "génériques"!

grims (16:47)

Coucou à tous ! une petite visite sur les quartiers Sons of anarchy, Outlander et Vikings serait sympa de jolis calendriers de Noël vous y attendent : ) merci d'avance pour votre passage

choup37 (17:13)

Calendriers aussi chez Kaamelott, Merlin, Doctor Who, Torchwood et Musketeers

choup37 (17:14)

(c'est super ces deux onglets pour alterner entre blabla et promo)

stella (19:34)

Case 5 du calendrier de l'avent de Downton Abbey vient d'être dévoilée.

Titepau04 (22:11)

Bonjour !!!! Venez vous inscrire aux concours de Noël dans les quartiers de ncis Los Angeles et s club 7!!!
Et n'hésitez pas à commenter les calendriers au passage!!
Et profitez-en pour voter sur le sondage ncisla!!!!

mnoandco (09:56)

Coucou! Le quartier Blacklist propose 3 calendriers totalement différents et de circonstances pour ce mois de décembre. N'hésitez pas à venir les commenter.

sabby (10:19)

Hello la citadelle !! Le quartier Friday Night Lights aurait bien besoin de visites. Personnes pour voter au sondage ni commenter le nouveau design. Venez jouer au ballon avec moi, je m’ennuie un peu tout seule là_bas

serieserie (10:19)

Allez allez, on s'inscrit pour l'HypnoGame Arrow!!

mamynicky (10:27)

'Jour les 'tits loups Un calendrier de l'Avent gourmand sur Downton Abbey et un autre musical sur Empire. Si vous êtes en retard, vous pouvez le rattraper et n'oubliez pas de les commenter. Merci

Titepau04 (10:34)

Bonjour !!!! Venez vous inscrire aux concours de Noël dans les quartiers de ncis Los Angeles et s club 7!!!
Et n'hésitez pas à commenter les calendriers au passage!!
Et profitez-en pour voter sur le sondage ncisla!!!!

arween (13:12)

Bonjour à tous ! Une grande animation vous attends sur The Night Shift ainsi que le calendrier et le sondage. Et sur Dollhouse, il y a un nouveau calendrier qui ne demande qu'à être commenté

roro73 (15:22)

Bonjour Nouveau sondage et nouvelles PDM sur Wildfire. Venez nous voir, on s'ennuie un peu =P

mamynicky (19:11)

Edgemont a besoin de clics sur son sondage. Merci

chrismaz66 (19:26)

J'y go Mamy et toujours chez Dr House le sondage Bad Boys, votez pour votre chouchou inter-séries, et quelques clics pour Torchwood qui en a bien besoin, merci

Phoebus (00:03)

Bonjour, nouveau sondage sur le quartier de Person Of Interest.

arween (09:26)

Bonjour ! Nous n'avons que peu de participants à l'animation The Night Shift... Elle est pourtant ouverte à tous ! Allez ne soyez pas timide et venez nous rendre visite

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