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115 : Script VO

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Point Place, Wisconsin
Saturday Afternoon


THE FORMAN’S BASEMENT :


Hyde, Kelso, Eric, and Fez are hanging out in the basement.

Hyde: You and Jackie did not do it.

Kelso: No, we so did it!

Fez: You're always saying that you did it.

Eric: Kelso, she wears the pants and they have never come off.

Kelso: Look at my face. This is the face that did it.

Fez: Holy smokes, I think he did it.

Hyde/Eric/Fez: Kelso did it!

Hyde: Yeah congratulations man. Plus you did it in record time.

Kelso: Yeah, you think?

Hyde: No, you moron! You've been kissing her ass for over a year!

Kelso: Yeah, well that's all over man. It's hard to explain to you kids that have never had sex before, but when you're with a woman something chemical happens to her. Now Jackie's totally different. She's like my love slave. Oh yeah, I'm that good!

Donna and Jackie come in

Donna: Hey guys.

Jackie: (To Kelso) Hi sweetie, how are you?

Kelso: Well actually I'm a little bit chilly, but I left my coat up in the car.

Jackie: Oh, I'll go get it for you! Miss me.

She goes out to get it

Kelso: Randy little thing, isn't she?

Eric: Ok, that was so cool!

Donna: Cool?

Eric: And by cool I mean wrong and stupid.

Hyde: Alright, shut up, shut up! Wrestling's back on.

Donna: Oh I love wrestling. (She get's Eric in a head lock and in the process pushes his face into her chest.) Come on, you're not even fighting back!

Hyde: Why would he fight back?

They hear an announcement on TV that Eric's favorite wrestler, Rocky Johnson, is coming to Kenosha to wrestle midgets

Eric: Rocky Johnson's coming to Kenosha, oh man we gotta go!

Hyde: I'm in. I love midgets man.

Red: (From upstairs) Eric, I need to see you up here.

Eric: Ok, I'll be right up.

(He doesn't move.)

Fez: You're not going up?

Eric: I'll go up when I'm ready.

All: Oh!


THE FORMAN’S KITCHEN :


Laurie's home from college. Kitty is folding her laundry

Laurie: So I just said to myself, "I don't care if all I have is dirty laundry and no money. I'm going home to see my parents because I love them very much."

Red: Aww.

Kitty: Oh my. Oh well, will you look at these!

She holds up a pair of boxer shorts

Laurie: Yeah Mom, all the girls are wearing them. (Eric comes in) Eric, where have you been?

Red: Yeah Eric, I called you five minutes ago.

Eric: I was watching wrestling.

Red: Did you take those books back to the library like I asked you to?

Eric: Uh, yeah, I took 'em back.

Red: Well then why did I see them in the backseat of your car?

Eric: Well I took them back to the car, which means that they're practically at the library.

Laurie: You know Dad, I feel sorry for all the good kids who wanted to read those books. That's who I feel sorry for.

Eric: Ok it's five books, a nickel a book, big deal, I'm out a quarter.

Red: It's not about the money, son. It's about the rules. And without the rules we might as well all be up in a tree flinging our crap at each other.

Eric: Uh, ok.

Red: The library closes in a half an hour, so get your ass over there.

Eric: Dad, you know all my friends are downstairs so-

Red: Hey, hey, hey pal, I'm not the bad guy here. Now you screwed yourself when you didn't return those books. Now go!

Eric: Ok. No.

Red: (He gets up and walks over to Eric) Did you say "No"? Are you telling me "No"? Is that what I'm hearing?

Eric: Yeah.

They stare each other down as old western music plays

Kitty: Oh dear.


THE FORMAN’S KITCHEN :


Red is reading the paper and Kitty is setting the table

Kitty: You know what's interesting?

Red: No.

Kitty: When you talk to Laurie you actually have a conversation, but with Eric you just give orders.

Red: Kitty, he said "No" to me.

Kitty: Well he's getting older, Red. I think it's time you two developed a friendship. 'Cause if you don't he'll move away and we'll never see him again. Is that what you want? Red?!

Red: I can't be friends with Eric. He's too...twitchy.

Kitty: Well, Red, until I see you make some kind of effort, I'm gonna keep bringing it up.

Red: Threats aren't gonna work Kitty.

Kitty: In the middle of every newspaper you're reading, every nap you're taking, every football game you're watching, I'll be there talking, talking, talking, talking.


THE PINCIOTTI’S KITCHEN :


Bob, Donna and Midge are having dessert

Midge: I'm thinking of starting therapy.

Donna: Ok, I'm gonna be...Bye! (She leaves)

Bob: Therapy? That's for crazies.

Midge: You know, the unexamined self is an unfulfilled self.

Bob: How can you be unfulfilled? I put a roof over your head, I pay the bills, I take care of you.

Midge: Yeah, but what do I do?

Bob: You fill out that sweater real nice.

Midge: What?! You...Oh!

She runs out of the kitchen

Bob: What?! That's a compliment.


THE FORMAN’S KITCHEN :


Red, Kitty and Eric are sitting at the table, Laurie is sitting at the counter

Kitty: Sit down Laurie, have some ribs.

Laurie: Mom, you know I'm on my water and yogurt diet.

Kitty: Ok. Well isn't this nice, my whole family together, mostly, having family fun 'cause that's what dinner's for, right Red?

Red: Ok. So, Eric, what happened at school today?

Eric: Why? What'd you hear?

Red: What's wrong with you? I can't ask a simple question.

Kitty: Red, Red, you need some potatoes! (Slamming the potatoes on his plate)

Red: Um...Good job returning those books.

Eric: Well yeah, I returned the books, even though it was kinda stupid.

Red: What?!

Laurie: He said it was stupid Daddy.

Kitty: Ok, ok. (laughs). Eric, what are you going to do this weekend.

Eric: Oh, me and the gang are gonna catch that wrestling match in Kenosha.

Kitty: Oh well now isn't that something? Because a certain Mr. Red Forman used to wrestle in high school.

Red: No, no, no, what I did then was real. That stuff on TV that's uh, that's all an act.

Kitty: Oh I don't know. I bet if the two of you went together you'd really enjoy yourselves. Right guys?

They start to object but Kitty slams her fists on the table

Eric: Ok.

Kitty: So you're going. (laughs)


THERAPIST’S LIVING ROOM :


Midge and the therapist are both sitting on his floor

Midge: And I think everyone has room to grow. But Bob is perfectly satisfied and says just being his wife should make me happy.

Therapist: Midge, let me stop you right there. I know we've only had one session, but from what I'm hearing, everything you say is completely right and everything that Bob says is completely wrong.

Midge: I think I'm gonna like therapy.

Therapist: I think therapy is gonna like you.


THE FORMAN’S DRIVEWAY :


The gang is getting ready to leave for Kenosha

Donna: Jackie, what are you doing here? You hate wrestling.

Jackie: Michael likes it and anything that Michael likes, I like 'cause I like Michael.

Kelso: Yeah, that's my girl.

Jackie and Kelso get in the back of the Vista Cruiser

Donna: Oh barf.

She goes to the front of the car

Red: Come on, watch your legs. (Closes the back door of the car. Bob comes over.)

Bob: Eh, taking the gang to the wrestling matches, huh? Ah, I guess I'll just sit home alone tonight since Midge is going to some therapy thing. I'll be alone.

Red: Get in the car Bob. (Eric walks over) Eric, give me the keys.

Eric: Why can't I drive?

Red: Because I wanna get there in one piece.

Kitty appears behind him

Hyde: (From inside the car) Hey, can we get a move on?! If I miss that twenty midget free for all, I'm gonna be super pissed!

Eric: Fine, you drive.

Kitty: Red?

Red: You know, on second thought, you should drive. After all, tonight I'm just one of the gang. (Eric gets in the car) This isn't gonna work, you know. We're gonna kill each other.

Kitty: Well fine, kill each other. Just do it together.


VISTA CRUISER :


Eric is driving. Everybody but Red is wrestling in the car

Red: Both hands on the wheel Eric. Ten and two, ten and two!

Eric: Dad, if you wanna drive...

Red: No, no, no, that's alright. I'm just one of the gang. Yield Eric! That sign says yield!

The scene switches to Red driving. Everyone is silent and looking straight ahead. Red has his music playing

Red: Ah, that's better.


WRESTLING MATCH :


Red, Eric and Donna are sitting together

Red: This is so ridiculous. When we get home tonight you better tell your mother we had a damn good time.

Eric: Well, so far so good.

Red: Yeah, yeah and now I've gotta go spend two dollars for a ten cent beer. (He gets up)

Donna: Gee, I'm so glad our dads came.

Eric: At least yours is leaving you alone.

Donna: Yeah. Poor Fez, huh?

Eric: Yeah.

Down the aisle Bob is sitting with his arm around Fez. Hyde is sitting on the other side of Fez

Bob: There I was sittin' in the kitchen, just sittin' in the kitchen when boom, she tells me she needs therapy. Midge and I had a beautiful thing Fezzie, then it all went wrong.

Hyde: Yeah Bob, women are hell. Why don't you grab us all a beer and we'll talk it over.

Bob: I can get you soda 'cause I know you're underage.

Hyde: Bob, this isn't about us. It's about you, and you need friends, and beer.

Bob: Hey, how stupid do you think I am?

Hyde: Why don't we grab a beer and we'll talk it over?

Bob: Ah, no.

Hyde: (Impersonating Bob) Well then Bob, you're on your own.

Fez: See how you drive people away.

They get up and leave him alone


THE FORMAN’S KITCHEN :


Kitty, Laurie and Midge are having coffee

Midge: I'm telling you, after my therapy session I felt so loose.

Laurie: Loose is good.

Kitty: If you ask me we could all do with a little tightening. (laughs)

Midge: And, and tonight my therapist is hosting an encounter group, but I'm too shy to go alone. (She looks at Kitty)

Kitty: Oh, well, too bad.

Midge: Oh Kitty, please come with me.

Kitty: I don't think so. No thank you. No.

Midge: You know what this is a lot like? Like when you asked me to help you host the bake sale, only it's different because I said "Yes."

Kitty: All right.

Midge: Oh great! It's a gathering of souls in progress over drinks.

Laurie: Free drinks? I'm in.

Kitty: Oh, that's nice. That's music to a mother's ears.


WRESTLING MATCH :


Red: What's going on here?

Eric: Ok, see that guy getting in the ring? That's Rocky Johnson. Yeah, he's the best!

Rocky starts wrestling a couple of midgets

Red: The best?! They're not even fighters. I mean, it's all tricks. I could get up there, right now and- Hot damn! He dropped that guy right on his head!

Eric: Yeah!

Later, Another Match: One wrestler gets the other in a headlock

Wrestler 1: Yeah, that's right, I got him! He's not goin' anywhere!

They continue to wrestle. Wrestler 1 pins the other and wins the match

Wrestler 1: Yeah! (The referee tries to hold up his arm) Get off me! I'm the winner here!

Kelso: Man, It's hot in here, huh?

Jackie: Oh you poor thing. (Takes ice from her drink and rubs it on his forehead.) Is that better, sweetie?

Kelso: Oh yeah.

Donna: Jackie, can I talk to you for a second?

Jackie: Yeah, yeah, sure. Michael-Oww! (Donna pulls her out of her seat.)

Donna: Jackie, what the hell is going on between you and Kelso?

Jackie: Michael Kelso and I have made beautiful love.

Donna: Ewww! I mean...No, ewww. Why are you being such a doormat?

Jackie: Look, I have to be nice. Look, what if he gets bored now?

Donna: Bored? Jackie, he's gonna wanna do it again.

Jackie: So, what you're saying is I'm totally in charge.

Donna: Well, I mean a partner-

Jackie; No, no, no, I own him!

Donna: Well, Jackie I-

Jackie: No, no. Thank you Donna.

Hyde steps up to the concession stand

Hyde: Good evening Sir. I would like a refreshing cola please.

Fez: (Off screen, using a deeper voice) And get me a beer, son.

Hyde: Ok, Dad, sure. And a beer for my dad...You're not gonna get me that beer are you?

Fez: (Walks over) What seems to be the problem, son?

Back by the ring: A wrestler gets thrown from the ring and lands by Eric and Red's feet. They jump up

Eric: What are you doing? Don't just sit there!

Red: Get up you big moose! Look, he's laughing at you.

Wrestler 2: I give and I give and I give!

Red: Boo hoo. Get back in the ring! (The wrestler gives them a threatening look and they sit down.) Hey, this is fun!


Later: Eric, Red and a crowd are waiting by the locker room door. Rocky Johnson walks through

Eric: Hey Rocky Johnson. Hey Mr. Johnson, Sir, may I have your autograph? (He goes straight into the locker room.)

Red: Eric, go in there and get your autograph.

Eric: No way Dad, the sign says wrestlers only.

Red: So?

Eric: So, that's a rule. As I remember, a great man once said to me if we were to break the rules, the world would just be filled with tree climbing crap flingers.

Red: Yeah. Now follow me. You want your autograph or no? (They go in.) There he is.

Eric: Mr. Johnson, you gave that team of midgets an ass whoopin’, sir.

Rocky: When you pile drive a little guy, the whole crowd turns on you. Then when you're standing there, wondering what they're booing about, you get bit on the knee caps. Look at my knees, midget bites.

Red: I wonder if you'd mind giving my son and autograph.

Manager: No. No, autographs.

Red: Look, I might be the only guy in here who’s actually killed a man.

Manager: Give the kid and autograph and then no more autographs.

Rocky: You know that's really nice, bringing your kid to a wrestling match. I got a son, and one day he's gonna become the most electrifying man in sports entertainment.

Red: Yeah, well, good luck with that. Uh, wanna make that out to Red Forman.

Eric: Uh, I don't think so. It's Eric Forman, capital E-R-I-C.

Red: Yeah but see, his nickname is Red.

Eric: Not it's not.

Red: Stop kidding around, Red.



Jackie and Kelso are watching the match

Kelso: You know, babe, a soda would taste pretty good right about now.

Jackie: Yeah, you're right, a soda does sound pretty good. I'll have a diet.

Kelso: I'll have a root beer...Um, don't you wanna go get it for me, sweetie?

Jackie: Ok, let me clear it up for you. GET ME A SODA. Now! (Kelso runs to get her soda. Jackie taps Donna on the shoulder.) Did you see that? I'm the man.

Bob walks over to Hyde and Fez with two beers, sits down, hands them over and puts his arms around the two of them

Bob: It all started about six months ago when Midgie got a subscription to Cosmo.


THERAPIST’S LIVING ROOM :


The encounter group is gathered on the floor along with Midge, Kitty and Laurie

Therapist: These group sessions are about testing your boundaries, losing your inhibitions and really sharing with the group. Kitty, are you ready?

Kitty: Oh, um, well...

Laurie: Share a little Mom. Tell us how folding the dish towels just right makes all our problems go away.

Kitty: You want me to share? Ok. Laurie, you're mean to your brother and you're screwing around at college. We don't even see you unless you run out of clean clothes or need cash. The fact is you're an ungrateful spoiled brat. (She breaks into laughter) Well, thank you. That was nice. I love you honey.

Therapist: Well, I hope we're all as excited about this journey as I am. Lets pair off.

The man sitting next to Kitty takes his shirt off

Kitty: Ok, oh. (She grabs Laurie and Midge and runs for the door.)

Midge: I don't get it Kitty. What's going on?

Kitty: I'll tell you what's going on, he's a bad doctor, a bad doctor.


THE FORMAN’S LIVING ROOM :


Red and Eric are just getting in

Eric: You know, thanks for letting me drive.

Red: Thanks for not killing me.

Eric: You know, I just had a lot of fun tonight with you Dad.

Red: Yeah, me too. (They get ready to wrestle.) Oh you want some, huh?

Eric: Yeah. (They wrestle. Eric tackles Red to the floor.) Yes! Who's the king?!

Red: Oww, my neck, oh.

Eric: Oh God, Dad I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I had no idea-

Red takes this opportunity to tavkle Eric to the floor

Red: Heh, heh, heh. Now who's the king, huh?

Eric: You are.

Red gives Eric a hug

Ecrit par jazzz 
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Sonmi451 (23:35)

Sur ce j'y vais aussi.

Sonmi451 (14:23)

Bonne journée à tous! Et Joyeuse St-Nicolas!

arween (18:40)

Vous êtes nombreux à fêter la Saint Nicolas ?

Xanaphia (19:04)

En tout cas chez moi aussi ça se fête Alors bonne Saint Nicolas

arween (19:05)

Dans le sud, ça ne se fête pas du tout

Xanaphia (19:11)

Et oui c'est plutôt du nord et de l'est de la France +la Belgique, si je ne dis pas de bêtise ^^

arween (19:11)

ouais donc loin de chez moi ^^

Xanaphia (19:12)

vous avez des fêtes spéciales par chez vous ?

arween (19:13)

Non rien du tout

arween (19:13)

Ah attends si on la fête de mai.

arween (19:14)

Mais je crois que c'est juste à Nice

Xanaphia (19:14)

la fête de mai ?

mnoandco (19:14)

Oui, chez moi aussi il y a la Saint Nicolas (Nord Est) ! et le père fouettard...pour les pas gentils...ne me sens évidement pas concernée!

arween (19:15)

Honnêtement je ne sors pas beaucoup là où il y a foule alors je sais pas trop ce qu'ils font

Xanaphia (19:15)

coucou ah oui le folklore local ^^

Lolo1710 (19:27)

Saint Nicolas c'est sacré en Belgique, les primaires font un spectacle chaque année puis les autre c'est surtout pour les bonbons ?

Xanaphia (19:29)

Ou les chocolats et les coquilles

Lolo1710 (19:41)

Ouaip, un truc génial aussi mais c'est peut être que dans mon école, c'est les filles qui font régime et qui troc des bonbons contre des mandarines

Sonmi451 (21:20)

Moi je fais saint-Nicolas car mon homme est du nord-Est mais ma fête à moi arrive jeudi. ^^

Sonmi451 (21:20)

Avec la fête des lumières.

Sonmi451 (21:21)

Bonsoir au fait!

Xanaphia (21:30)

Bonsoir Ah la fête des lumières ça doit être joli ^^

Sonmi451 (21:36)

Très.

Sonmi451 (21:37)

Cette année, je vais me contenter de mettre les lampions aux fenêtres.

serieserie (08:40)

Bonne journée de chasse aux cadeaux sur la citadelle!

CastleBeck (15:46)

BOnjour ici!
Je viens de lire qu'une de mes séries préférées est renouvelée pour une 4e saison avec ajout d'un de mes acteurs préférés. Il me semble que ça met du bonheur dans ma journée <--- Oui, ça ne m'en prend pas beaucoup!

CastleBeck (15:53)

(Tiens, dans l'article ils disent que ce sera diffusé prochainement sur France 2... C'est bon à savoir. Si vous voyez passer Mensonges sur France 2, vous regardez!)

aline2408 (22:27)

Joyeux Anniversaire James723

aline2408 (22:28)

Joyeux Anniversaire James723

James723 (22:28)

Thank you ^^

serieserie (16:44)

Inscrivez-vous vite pour la grande partie d'HypnoGame Arrow qui aura lieu dans 6 jours!! Rendez-vous dans les forums de l'accueil!!

arween (18:46)

Venez voir les nouveaux calendriers de The Night Shift (serie²) et Dollhouse (Xana).

emeline53 (19:24)

Seulement 2 persones pour commenter le design Noël de The Fosters ? Venez donner votre avis en plus, un sondage sur votre souhait de cadeau est en ligne !

stella (19:25)

Special spécial Noel sur le quartier Downton Abbey et sans oublier son calendrier de l'avent original

DGreyMan (22:40)

Bonsoir. Sondage dédié à "Game of Thrones" dans le quartier "Harry Potter"...

DGreyMan (22:40)

... ou le contraire ! ^^

serieserie (09:07)

Plus que quelques jours pour vous inscrire à la grande soirée HypnoGame Arrow dans les forums de l'accueil ou par MP!!!

arween (09:44)

Bonjour à tous ! Aujourd'hui nous lançons une toute nouvelle rubrique, les reviews. Rendez-vous sur la page HypnoReview ou à l'accueil pour plus d'infos Bonne lecture et bonne journée !

Titepau04 (09:49)

Bonjour !!!! Venez vous inscrire aux concours de Noël dans les quartiers de ncis Los Angeles et s club 7!!!
Et n'hésitez pas à commenter les calendriers au passage!!

cinto (11:39)

Fans de Dallas, Friends, Petite maison , Mission impossible, venez défendre votre série préférée chez Ma sorcière bien aimée: sondage "génériques"!

grims (16:47)

Coucou à tous ! une petite visite sur les quartiers Sons of anarchy, Outlander et Vikings serait sympa de jolis calendriers de Noël vous y attendent : ) merci d'avance pour votre passage

choup37 (17:13)

Calendriers aussi chez Kaamelott, Merlin, Doctor Who, Torchwood et Musketeers

choup37 (17:14)

(c'est super ces deux onglets pour alterner entre blabla et promo)

stella (19:34)

Case 5 du calendrier de l'avent de Downton Abbey vient d'être dévoilée.

Titepau04 (22:11)

Bonjour !!!! Venez vous inscrire aux concours de Noël dans les quartiers de ncis Los Angeles et s club 7!!!
Et n'hésitez pas à commenter les calendriers au passage!!
Et profitez-en pour voter sur le sondage ncisla!!!!

mnoandco (09:56)

Coucou! Le quartier Blacklist propose 3 calendriers totalement différents et de circonstances pour ce mois de décembre. N'hésitez pas à venir les commenter.

sabby (10:19)

Hello la citadelle !! Le quartier Friday Night Lights aurait bien besoin de visites. Personnes pour voter au sondage ni commenter le nouveau design. Venez jouer au ballon avec moi, je m’ennuie un peu tout seule là_bas

serieserie (10:19)

Allez allez, on s'inscrit pour l'HypnoGame Arrow!!

mamynicky (10:27)

'Jour les 'tits loups Un calendrier de l'Avent gourmand sur Downton Abbey et un autre musical sur Empire. Si vous êtes en retard, vous pouvez le rattraper et n'oubliez pas de les commenter. Merci

Titepau04 (10:34)

Bonjour !!!! Venez vous inscrire aux concours de Noël dans les quartiers de ncis Los Angeles et s club 7!!!
Et n'hésitez pas à commenter les calendriers au passage!!
Et profitez-en pour voter sur le sondage ncisla!!!!

arween (13:12)

Bonjour à tous ! Une grande animation vous attends sur The Night Shift ainsi que le calendrier et le sondage. Et sur Dollhouse, il y a un nouveau calendrier qui ne demande qu'à être commenté

roro73 (15:22)

Bonjour Nouveau sondage et nouvelles PDM sur Wildfire. Venez nous voir, on s'ennuie un peu =P

mamynicky (19:11)

Edgemont a besoin de clics sur son sondage. Merci

chrismaz66 (19:26)

J'y go Mamy et toujours chez Dr House le sondage Bad Boys, votez pour votre chouchou inter-séries, et quelques clics pour Torchwood qui en a bien besoin, merci

Phoebus (00:03)

Bonjour, nouveau sondage sur le quartier de Person Of Interest.

arween (09:26)

Bonjour ! Nous n'avons que peu de participants à l'animation The Night Shift... Elle est pourtant ouverte à tous ! Allez ne soyez pas timide et venez nous rendre visite

SeySey (12:55)

Bonjour! Nouveau sondage spécial fête de Noel sur le quartier Under The Dome! Venez nombreux!

liliju (15:55)

Un sondage spécial Noël vous attend sur le quartier des zombies (The Walking Dead). Ils ont besoin de vous. Merci de votre temps

Titepau04 (17:06)

Bonjour !!!! Venez vous inscrire aux concours de Noël dans les quartiers de ncis Los Angeles et s club 7!!!
Et n'hésitez pas à commenter les calendriers au passage!!
Et profitez-en pour voter sur le sondage ncisla!!!!

chrismaz66 (17:39)

'Soir, venez départagez nos ex-aequo au sondage House, et Torchwood va bientôt fêter ses 10 ans : animations signées Choup! Un petit coucou serait sympa Merci

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