HypnoFriends : ton âme soeur kiffe les mêmes séries TV que toi !
VOTE | 54 fans |

#413 : L'amour ou l'argent

Titre original: Jackie Says Cheese
Réalisé par: David Trainer
Écrit par: Mark Hudis
Guests: Nicholas Gonzalez (Thomas)
Date de diffusion: 8 janvier 2002

Eric surprend Red qui fouille dans les tiroirs de son armoire à la recherche de préservatifs que Kitty lui avait donné quelques heures plus tôt. Mais Eric, loin de penser que son père pourrait avoir besoin de préservatifs, pense qu'il a trouvé la cachette où Hyde cachait son herbe. Jackie trouve un emploi de vendeuse de fromage. Et de son coté, fez est jaloux du nouvel étranger, qui semble avoir beaucoup plus de succès que lui auprès des filles.

Plus de détails


ERIC: Hey. L'Eggo my Eggo.

RED: Hey. L'Eggo my foot in your ass.

KITTY: Oh. Good morning. Oh, here, honey. I brought you something back from the hospital. A lollipop!

ERIC: Mom, I'm 17 years old.

KITTY: Which is why I also brought you condoms (Eric and Red groan). Well see, we had a teenage mom come in, and it's just… Well, you know, I worry about you.

ERIC: That I'll get pregnant? You're not a good nurse.

KITTY: Now don't be a porky mouth. Oh. Here. Sexual health pamphlets (Eric and Red groan). I just want you to know that intercourse is a responsibility, not just a right.

ERIC: Okay, well, this couldn't be more uncomfortable (he gets up to leave)

KITTY: Oh don't forget your condoms!

ERIC: I was wrong!


Eric and Kelso are looking at some records. Hyde comes out of his bedroom

HYDE: Hey man. Red's been spot-checking my room again. I can't believe he still doesn't trust me. You know, that really hurts, man. I'm gonna need you to hide my stash (he gives it to Eric)

ERIC: Sure. I'll put it in my dresser under my Hong Kong Phooey socks. He can protect anything, because he's faster than the human eye!

DONNA (coming in): You guys, the funniest thing just happened toJackie.

JACKIE: Michael the most horrible thing just happened to me. My father found out we're back together. And if we don't break up, he'll never give me any money ever again.

HYDE: Wait. If you break up with Kelso, you'll be rich? Talk about your win-win.

KELSO: Hold on. He didn't know we were dating?

DONNA: Here comes the best part. I mean the worst part.

JACKIE: My dad thinks you're a bad influence on me, so I kept our love a secret. And now I have to decide between you and money.

ERIC: Gosh. It's like Sophie's Choice for morons.

DONNA: Hey, let's take a poll. Who thinks Sophie should keep Kelso? (nobody does anything) The money? (they all raise their hand)

JACKIE: You guys, this isn't a joke.

HYDE: But it's funny like a joke.

JACKIE: How do I choose between something that makes my whole life complete and you?

KELSO: Well I don't know baby, but I love you.

JACKIE: Oh Michael, I love you too. Okay, I choose love. I choose love! (they hug)


JACKIE: Yeah aw! Okay. Now get a job, because I need a ton of money.


Hyde, Eric and Donna are sitting at a table. Fez walks in with a guy

FEZ: Guys I would like you to meet Point Place's new foreign exchange student, Tomas.

HYDE: Hey.

ERIC: What's up?

TOMAS (to Donna): Hello pretty lady with eyes like the sea.

DONNA: No. Which sea?

FEZ: Okay, easy there, Casa-new-guy. I'm showing Tomas the ropes.

TOMAS (to a girl that walks by): Hello.

FEZ: What, are you crazy? That's Nicole Mayzell. She's way out of our league.

TOMAS: Oh. Then we must be in different leagues because I just had sex with her last night.

HYDE: Oh-ho-ho! New foreign guy: uno. Old foreign guy: nada.

FEZ: This is outrageous! The closest I have come to sex was when the football team pinned me down in the shower and made me kiss my own ass!

ERIC: Hey um, if you think that's close to sex then you're gonna be delighted with actual sex.

DONNA: Yeah Tomas, you should stay away from the football team for a while. We wouldn't want a cutie like you to get hurt.

TOMAS: Oh the football team loves me. I'm their new placekicker!

FEZ: What? Oh the room is spinning! How did you do all this?

TOMAS: I have delightful accent.

FEZ: So do I.

TOMAS: Yes but a nerd with an accent is still a nerd. Now good day, sir.

FEZ (scoffing): I say ''good day.'' Now, good day.

TOMAS: Good day.

FEZ: Good day.

BOTH: I said, good day! (Tomas leaves)

FEZ: He stole that from me.

ERIC: But, Fez...

FEZ: I said, from me!


The radio is playing. Red and Kitty are in bed. Red reaches for something in his drawer

RED: Oh I'm out.

KITTY: Out? I am home one night this week and you're out?

RED: Hey don't look at me. You had a whole bag of'em, and you wasted 'em on Eric! He's probably down there making balloon animals.

KITTY: Well I guess we'll just sleep.

RED: Well couldn't we just, uh... You know, I mean, really, what are the chances?

KITTY: OH! We could have a change-of-life baby!

RED: Oh crap. I'll be right back.


Red sneaks in and looks through the drawers. Eric and Hyde come in; all three of them stare guiltily at each other.

RED: It's late. We'll talk about this tomorrow (he leaves)

ERIC: Oh, my God. My sock drawer. I'm dead! He found your stash! Do you know what this means?

HYDE: Yeah. I get your room and you get sent to military school.


Red comes in, panting

RED: Eric caught me stealing his... things.

KITTY: Ahahahahaha!

RED: That's not funny. I'm a grown man. I don't go rummaging around in teenage boys' drawers looking for... things.

KITTY: Condoms.

RED: That word is forbidden!

KITTY: Okay. Good night (in his ear) Condoms.

RED: Quit it!


Tomas is sitting at a table with two girls, laughing. Fez and Hyde are watching from the side

TOMAS: I don't know. I've just always been good-looking.

FEZ: Look at that foreign bastard cracking up the whores.

HYDE: Checking the score. Old foreign guy: nada. New foreign guy: dos.

FEZ: Hey if I pretend to say something funny, will you laugh?


FEZ: That Tomas is shady. But have you noticed he never says what country he's from?

HYDE: What country are you from?

FEZ: What country are you from?

HYDE: America.

FEZ: Fine. Mystery solved.


Kitty is cooking.

ERIC (sticking his around the door): Psst. Mom. Is Dad around?

KITTY: No, I think he's upstairs.

Eric runs in, takes a sip of his orange juice and takes an freshly boiled egg

ERIC: Hot! Hot, hot, hot, hot! Love you, Mom. Thanks for breakfast. See ya tonight. Bye.

RED (Sticking his head around the door): Psst! Kitty, Eric around?

KITTY: No. He just left.

RED: Perfect!

KITTY: Red, this is just silly. You can't avoid Eric forever.

RED: I know that.

KITTY: Well, good.

RED: I just have to avoid him till he goes to college. What's that like, a year? I can do that.


Donna is reading on the couch. Jackie is pacing around

KELSO (coming in): Hey.

JACKIE: Michael I'm broke. I had to buy generic hair conditioner. And now, I have split ends.

KELSO: Oh no one is gonna notice that, baby. They'll all be looking at that monster zit.

JACKIE: I have to ration my cover-up. So find a job already!

KELSO: I'm tryin', okay? It's tough out there. I just had an interview at that new store in the mall, the Cheese Palace.

DONNA: Where curd is king?

KELSO: The very same. They're hiring a new cheese maiden, you know, to hand out the samples. But I didn't get the job 'cause they want a girl.

DONNA: But you're pretty like a girl.

KELSO: Thank you! Man, but the manager wants an actual girl…. you know, with boobs and stuff.

DONNA: Hey, you know who's an actual girl with boobs and stuff?

JACKIE: Oh Donna, you don't have to get a job just for me.

DONNA: I was talking about you, pimple chin.

JACKIE: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I am not getting a job. A job is for poor people. I am a rich person who doesn't have money. Big diff.

KELSO: Hey, is that a blackhead?



Jackie is handing out cheese samples

JACKIE: Cheddar? Cheddar? Cheddar? Try the Swiss. You can't miss. Try the cheddar! It's even better!

HYDE: The floor's real shiny and I see your heinie.


HYDE: Hey! The cheese maiden hit me! Cheese guards, seize her!

JACKIE: My God, this job is awful!

DONNA: Are you sweating? I mean, is work making you sweat?

JACKIE: No. I'm glistening! It's glisten!

KELSO: Whatever it is... Yech!

JACKIE: Look, Michael the only reason I have this job is so that you and I can be together. All you've done for our love is sit in a basement eating Fritos.

KELSO: Well, for your information if I send in empty Frito bags I get a free remote-control car which I was gonna give to you after I played with it only a little. Now, that is love!


Hyde is sitting in his chair. Fez is pacing around

FEZ: Tomas! Tomas! Tomas! What I have to do is show everyone that I am cooler than Tomas. You know I once saw the Fonzie do something on TV that just might do the trick...


Fez is wearing a leather jacket and a swim suit. The gang is standing behind him, also dressed in swim suits

FEZ: I am now going to jump over a shark on water skis to prove that I'm the coolest foreign exchange student in Point Place.

TOMAS: He'll never make it.

DONNA: Shut up. He can do it. He's the Fez!

FEZ: Okay here I go. Hit it!

We see Fez on waterski's and images of a shark under water

ERIC: Oh! He's crazy, man! He's crazy!

HYDE: He's at the ramp!

FEZ (jumping): Ay!

He "jumps" over the shark and the girls leave Tomas and walk over to Fez

ERIC: Yes! Fez!

HYDEL: Yeah, man!

JACKIE: You suck, Tomas!

Tomas is crying

ERIC: Fez, you jumped that shark, and you're not even wet.

FEZ: That's 'cause I'm cool-a-mundo. Ay!


FEZ: So, what do you think?

HYDE: Not only is that the worst idea I've ever heard it was the worst moment in television history.

FEZ: Yeah, you're right. I stopped watching after that episode. Tomas!

Later, Eric, Hyde and Kelso are hanging out at the basement

ERIC: This is freaky man. Red hasn't said anything about the stash which can only mean he's gone to the much-feared stage: beyond yelling. He's gone Darth Vader, man.

KELSO: Or... instead of Red snagging you maybe you snagged Red... dipping into Hyde's stash! I'm just sayin', everyone's tryin' it.


HYDE: I guess Kelso's right. Everyone is trying it.

RED (with a bottle of whipped cream in his hand): I'm tellin' ya, this stuff isn't just for cakes. It's great all by itself (he sprays it in his mouth) Mmm! Wait, wait. Watch this (he sprays some on his head) Look at me. I'm Whipped-cream Head! Fear me! All fear Whipped-cream Head! Hahahahahahaha!  Mmm!

Back in the here and now...

ERIC: Kelso, that was delightful. But the only part you left out is where Red kills me!

HYDE: Forman, it was my stash. I don't wanna leave you hangin'. But I'm gonna. So good luck in military school.


Fez is driving. Hyde is in the front, Tomas is the back

TOMAS: How exciting! My first American road trip. I can't wait to see Lake Dill-hole.

FEZ: Well, the wait is over. We're here. Now hop out, you crazy son of a gun.

HYDE: This is the Michigan border.

FEZ: Well, what do you know.

TOMAS (outside the car): So where is Lake Dill-hole?

FEZ: Oh, it's right there behind the Get Bent Memorial. So get bent, dill-hole!

Fez drives off, leaving Tomas behind

FEZ: What's the score now? Oh, here we go. Fez: one. Tomas: stranded in Michigan! Oh, I kill me.

HYDE: Nice job.

FEZ: Thanks. I learned from the best.

HYDE: Thanks. I would've taken his clothes.

FEZ: That's why you're the king.


Jackie is still handing out samples

JACKIE: The Gouda's so good-a. The Havarti's a party!

KELSO: Hello, milady. ''Fondue'' you love me?

DONNA: Stop doing that! All day with this. ''Hey, 'fondue' me.'' ''Ooh, I stepped in 'fon-dog-due.'''

JACKIE: Oh my God. This is awful. Michael, a few minutes ago, I smelled stinky cheese... and it was me! Look I'm sorry. I love you, but I can't do this.

KELSO: You mean, you can't ''fondue'' it.

JACKIE: God, will you shut up! Look, I am not cut out for work. I'm cut out for having rich people give me things.

KELSO: But you got a job for me. I mean, doesn't that make you satisfied?

Jackie's boss hands her a check

JACKIE: Oh, my gosh! It's a check! And that's my name! Mine!

KELSO: So we can stay together!

JACKIE: Yeah, and I can still be rich!

KELSO: Yeah!

DONNA: Well if this isn't gonna go badly, I'm heading home.

KELSO: No wait. Jackie deserves a celebration. Hey, let's go buy me that remote-control car!

JACKIE: No, Michael. Money doesn't grow on trees (realizing) Money doesn't grow on trees! You know, I think having a job is changing me. Okay, think about it. A whole new me.

DONNA & KELSO: That'd be great.


Red is standing near the counter, so is Kitty. Eric walks in

ERIC & RED: I gotta... I'm gonna... (they try to leave)

KITTY: Okay, enough! You, sit.

ERIC: You can't make me join the army, okay? I'll cut off a toe!

RED: What?

KITTY: Okay, okay. We are just gonna clear the air. Right now. Now, Eric, the other night your father and I were getting intimate (Red and Eric groan) and we realized we didn't have any protection.

RED: For hugging. We just… We hug.

KITTY: So your dad went to your room looking for one of those condoms I gave you and you caught him, and he has just been so embarrassed ever since.

ERIC: Condoms? Oh! Condoms.

RED: Yeah, condoms. What did you think it was?

ERIC: What did you think it was?

RED & KITTY: What did you do?

ERIC: What did you do?..... I-I didn't do anything. Okay? You stole condoms! Get him, Mom.

RED: You're grounded.

KITTY: For a week.

RED: Hyde too. Whatever was in that drawer that you didn't want me to see, I'm sure it was his.

ERIC: Fine. No complaints here. Thank you (he leaves)

KITTY: You suppose there was actually something in that drawer he didn't want us to see?

RED: Who cares?



Jackie is talking to her boss

JACKIE: I know in orientation we talked about theft in the workplace so I would like to report a theft from my check. Now, I don't know who FICA is but that bitch stole like 10% of my money. Also, now, I don't know if you have this key in your typewriter but when I write ''Jackie,'' I like to dot my ''I'' with a smiley face. Also now, I put this in the suggestion box, but… You have something hanging from your nose. Oh and I want Saturday off. Thank you. Bye.


Qui a vu cet épisode ?

Pour l'instant, aucun membre de la communauté n'a indiqué avoir vu cet épisode.

Derniers commentaires

Avant de poster un commentaire, clique ici pour t'identifier.

Sois le premier à poster un commentaire sur cet épisode !

Bannière de l'animation HypnoDesign 10-2016
Activité récente

En ce 15 octobre, Tanya Roberts fête ses 61 ans. Nous lui souhaitons un joyeux anniversaire et une...

Sortie AS : Brooke Shields

Sortie AS : Brooke Shields
Le 6 Octobre 2016, Brooke Shields a assisté au The VIP Luncheon Launching The Niche Fragrance Line -...


Laura Prepon et Ben Foster ont profité de la première du film "The Girl on the Train" qui avait lieu...

iHeartRadio Music Festival

iHeartRadio Music Festival
Wilmer Valderrama était au iHeartRadio Music Festival qui s'est tenu le 24 septembre à Las...

Ce soir à 20h55 sur NT1, vous pourrez retrouver Ashton Kutcher dans le film "Jackpot" où il...


Les nouveautés des séries et de notre site une fois par mois dans ta boîte mail ?

Inscris-toi maintenant

Partenaires premium

Sonmi451 (10:02)

Pour ceux qui prévoit déjà des choses pour le mois prochain, sachez que le calendrier de novembre est disponible sur Scrubs et Urgences.

grims (10:28)

Hello tout le monde ! déjà cinq participants pour le concours wallpapers Samain sur le quartier Outlander ! venez vous inscrire et nous faire partager vos talents merci et bonne journée sur HypnoSeries

Sonmi451 (10:53)

D'ailleurs, j'ai commencé ma créa! ^^

Xanaphia (15:17)

Coucou tout le monde ! N'oubliez pas ce soir l'agent Peggy carter des films Marvel arrive dans sa propre série sur TMC à 20h55... N'hésitez pas à regarder et commenter sur le quartier du SHIELD...

noemie3 (18:54)

Coucou ! N'hésitez pas à aller voter au sondage sur Wildfire et même à nous laisser un commentaire Pareil sur Private, merciii

Merane (20:17)

N'oubliez pas ce soir, le spin-off de Doctor Who, Class fait ses débuts . Retrouvez tous les infos sur la série et un espace de discussion sur le quartier Doctor Who. Bonne soirée .

grims (21:27)

Bonsoir tout le monde ! déjà cinq participants pour le concours wallpapers Samain sur le quartier Outlander ! venez vous inscrire et nous faire partager vos talents merci et bonne soirée sur HypnoSeries

grims (09:50)

Bonjour la citadelle à l'occasion du "Focus sur Nip/Tuck", le quartier relance la photo du mois ! et quoi de mieux que de départager des wallpapers ! alors bon vote !!!

Titepau04 (09:51)

Ouh lala, faut vraiment que j'aille vérifier ma vue!!! Grims, j'ai cru que tu disais un gros mot!!! Lol!!!!

grims (11:28)

@Titepau04 Je n'oserai pas

Titepau04 (11:28)


juju93 (12:18)

Bonjour la citadelle, 6 génériques de séries sont toujours à visionner et départager dans le sondage du quartier The L Word. Osez venir voir vous serez peut-être surpris(es) par les choix soumis à vos votes

Merlinelo (18:18)

Finalement, un nouveau sondage et PDM sur le quartier Orphan Black! Venez nous soutenir et laisser un petit commentaire! Merci et bonne soirée à tous

carina123 (18:46)

Nouveau sondage sur le quartier Jéricho, n'hésitez pas à venir, merci, Bonne soirée

emeline53 (19:55)

Au programme de ce dimanche soir : nouveau sondage sur Life Unexpected, nouvelle photo de l'épisode pour le retour de The Vampires Diaries + le review pour commenter l'épisode ! On vous attend et le sondage spécial Halloween sur The Fosters est toujours dispo !!

grims (20:09)

Bonsoir tout le monde ! déjà cinq participants pour le concours wallpapers Samain sur le quartier Outlander ! venez vous inscrire et nous faire partager vos talents merci et bonne soirée sur HypnoSeries

grims (20:10)

Et à l'occasion du "Focus sur Nip/Tuck", le quartier relance la photo du mois ! et quoi de mieux que de départager des wallpapers ! alors bon vote !!!

man0n49 (20:56)

Le quartier Chicago Fire a ouvert encore plus ses portes à la série Chicago Med ! N'hésitez pas à venir commenter les épisodes de Chicago Med avec nous et à développer la série sur le quartier ! On vous attend nombreux.

carina123 (21:57)

Nouveaux sondages sur les quartiers Lie to Me et Jéricho, venez nombreux ! Merci, Bonne soirée à tous !

Steed91 (10:35)

Bonjour à tous,

serieserie (11:44)

Concours entre Archers pour Arrow et Robin des Bois, 10 ans du quartier sur Bones, CPDAwards sur Chicago PD, un nouveau jeu dans les forums de Scorpion, les 7 pêchés capitaux sur Lucifer, je vous attend Pas le temps de s'ennuyer!

abeilledic (12:18)

Nouveau débat sur Ma sorcière bien-aimée ^^. Venez nous donner votre avis

albi2302 (17:35)

Une soirée HypnoGame spéciale Halloween, est organisée samedi 29 octobre.
C'est un thème général sur les séries de sorcières, vampires, fantômes, zombies, monstres, horreurs et surnaturels.
Vous avez jusqu'au 26 octobre pour vous inscrire sur le forum

Naley47 (21:50)


grims (21:53)

Bonsoir tout le monde ! déjà cinq participants pour le concours wallpapers Samain sur le quartier Outlander ! venez vous inscrire et nous faire partager vos talents merci et bonne soirée sur HypnoSeries

grims (21:54)

Et à l'occasion du "Focus sur Nip/Tuck", le quartier relance la photo du mois ! et quoi de mieux que de départager des wallpapers ! alors bon vote !!!

chrismaz66 (08:04)

Je sors aussi mes DR. HOUSE Venez découvrir chaque jour les réponses au jeu 1 personnage = 1 animal, et venez en discuter si vous n'êtes pas d'accord ou bien oui! Et venez rire avec nous! Nice Day

albi2302 (11:20)

Une soirée HypnoGame spéciale Halloween, est organisée samedi 29 octobre.
C'est un thème général sur les séries de sorcières, vampires, fantômes, zombies, monstres, horreurs et surnaturels.
Vous avez jusqu'au 26 octobre pour vous inscrire sur le forum

carina123 (17:58)

Bonjour à tous ! * Sondages sur quartiers Lie to Me et Jéricho, venez, Merci !

emeline53 (21:45)

Le concours Freeform est toujours en place ! Les quartiers PLL, Shadowhunters, Baby Daddy et The Fosters (entre autres !!) vous attendent pour participer au quizz et/ou au concours de wallpapers bonne soirée !

Ceci est un extrait des dernières discussions de notre Room HypnoBlabla

Rejoins-nous !

Ou utilise nos Apps :

Disponible sur Google Play